“Don’t live to prove them wrong. Live to assure yourself that what they told you was a lie.”
That is a statement that I’ve discovered some time ago and it has stuck with me ever since. The reality is—we often spend so much time trying to prove to people that we are WORTHY or SOMETHING TRULY AMAZING, which somehow causes us to forget our own REAL worthiness. I know that I am guilty of this. I don’t know about you. It’s a very taxing uphill to keep climbing, while hoping that you don’t slip or fall on your way up because you know that EVERYONE is looking. But why live that way? Why spend so much of your time trying to live your life to the design and blueprint of others (who I might add–may not be living their life that amazing anyway!)? The key to this whole thing is that this is YOUR life, not theirs.
Things change. People change. Money changes (or the amount you have, rather). Status changes. Even the weather changes (that’s why four seasons exist). But one thing that should remain the same is your understanding of who you are and who God meant for you to be (ultimately equating to your purpose). You don’t have to be religious to understand this. Heck, you don’t even have to be human. In my observation, I see that animals and other forms of living things (plants, trees, etc.) even understand the whole notion of “purpose”. Animals find food, procreate, protect, etc., regardless of their environment or the other animals around them. They simply function in the way that they were built to.
Even plants and tress understand that their purpose is to give off oxygen and shade to animals, humans, and anything alike. They don’t care about other plants or tress or buildings (or whatever else is around them). But i’m sure that you get my point. Haha.
But on a more serious note—in all understanding, life does get hard. Unfortunately, we weren’t given the promise of an
easy life. While this remains true, we must understand that even the greatest people have gone through tough moments AND still has their fair share of problems. Success does not guarantee that you won’t have any issues. It just means that you may have different types of issues going forward (if the old ones aren’t repeated). Life is a Ying and Yang. Good and Bad. Success and Struggle. So you’re not alone, trust me. Struggle (in any form) is a common denominator amongst ALL humans. Just remember that. But the real question is, are you going to allow your tough moments to keep you stuck in the toughness? Of course, I can tell you that you shouldn’t, but the important thing is–what are you going to tell yourself?
Believe it or not, I, myself, have been through a few tough moments (some moments harder than others). I’ve had my fair share of living from paycheck to paycheck, being without a job during some of life’s greatest milestones (entering into Motherhood, marriage, etc.), battling illness, going through depression, being rejected by family, not finishing school, struggling financially, coping with death, unexpectedly living on my own without support, being overlooked, counted out, under-appreciated, being evicted, being lied on, and a ton of other stuff. Unfortunately, struggle is something that none of us can escape. However, God did promise that all things will work together for the good of those that love Him; So you must count it all joy! Because it’s in the toughest moments that we are able to grow and be cultivated into something much greater than we appear to be in that moment.
Greatness happens in opposition.
But you must first be willing to face the opposition until that greatness comes. Patience is key. And yes, I know that patience is so hard, especially when Life has a way of speaking louder than the promise AND so does the internal voices that so many of us battle with daily! Trust me, I’ve had to wait for things that I felt took FOREVER to happen. And yes, you will go through a period of frustration. And then anger. And then sadness. And maybe even discouragement or near depression. BUT it is in those very moments, that I’ve personally learned, that your change is much closer than you really think. It’s just a testing of your FAITH.
Understand this–no one is saying that life is a simple formula or that everyone has the same solution to their problem. However, I am saying that things are INTENTIONAL and there is nothing that hasn’t already been considered before God has allowed it to happen in your life. So if you’ve been dealt cards in life where you’re a single mother and you don’t receive help from your child’s father, know that God gave you the strength to pull through it. And if you’ve been given a chance to bring a child into this world (and you feel like it’s the worst timing EVER), know that God’s blessings are often in disguise and He’s trusted you with another human-being to love & nurture ANYWAY. And if you’ve been constantly isolated and hated by those you love and the relationships you long for never seem to work out, just know that God intended the losses so that He could get the glory for the great things He’s preparing you for. And if you feel like nothing seems to be going right for you as if–if it’s not one thing, it’s another thing; just know that God promised that after you’ve suffered awhile He’ll make you established and perfect (1 Peter 5:10)→by far one of my FAVORITE scriptures.
All in all, just remember that there’s nothing too hard for God! And what He doesn’t change simply means that it’s not time for that change yet or that there’s still something you need to learn in the process. Embrace the process. Embrace your journey. We all have a story. We all have things that happen to us in our lives which seem hard, unfair, and unbearable at times. But know that what we go through in life is meant to be an inspiration for others to be encouraged by.
Greatness is a responsibility. To whom much is given, much is required.
So before you spend the rest of your life trying to prove others wrong, just understand that TRUE blessings never need to be proven by us. Ultimately, your light has to shine and nothing can dim it. Blessings prove themselves. And truly blessed people don’t have the time to worry about what others think. They’re busy worrying about what God thinks. And they’re busy doing what God has purposed them to do. So be YOU. Love YOU (Flaws & ALL). And believe in YOU. God didn’t take the time out to create YOU just so that you would be contrived into other people’s expectations of you. Be your own version of YOU (in whatever way that may be). Have your own expectations of YOU.
And walk in YOUR perfect find.
Photo credit: https://stylizimoblog.com/no/2017/03/21/spring-flowers-outdoors/